


Those Fucking Weirdos

by MusicalRaven



Category: Game Grumps, Real Person Fiction, Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Awkward Conversations, Awkward Flirting, F/M, Fluff and Humor, M/M, Mild Blood, Slurs, possible murder
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-24
Updated: 2017-10-24
Packaged: 2019-01-22 07:28:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,712
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12476428
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MusicalRaven/pseuds/MusicalRaven
Summary: Being at a laundromat at two in the morning isn't the best, but being there when someone comes in carrying a pile of bloody clothes is worse. Arin might just get murdered, and fuck if it won't be his own damn fault.





	Those Fucking Weirdos

**Author's Note:**

> Original prompt from [here](http://theappleppielifestyle.tumblr.com/post/112392287541/list-of-aus-to-consider-where-one-or-both-of-ur).
> 
> Have some cute (not so) murder boys.

_Ping_

_Ping_

Arin glared at the door of the dryer, arms crossed tight over his chest. Why did his slacks have to have that stupid metal clasp? And _why_ did it seem so keen to attach itself to the side of the dryer? Arin wanted to pull the door open, snip off the clasp, and start it back up much quieter... But sadly, he needed his pants to actually stay on his person. Dammit.

He heaved a sigh and leaned back against the nearest washer, the nightgown he'd stolen from Suzy swishing against his legs. He figured by now he might as well own it with how often he wore it. He was pretty sure Suzy had only even touched the thing twice since she'd bought it. Arin, on the other hand, practically lived in it. He'd have to ask if she wouldn't mind giving it to him. Then he'd feel less guilty about taking it so often.

As it was, dashing to the laundromat at two am in said nightgown because he needed these clothes washed for tomorrow's meeting wasn't his preferred way to show off his sleepwear to the world. He crossed his legs, teeth digging into his bottom lip. So far, no one else had bothered to come into the laundromat this late, but he knew he shouldn't hold out hope. Living in a city the size of L.A, there was no doubt another poor schmuk who needed something washed this late. Or early, Arin supposed.

The bell ringing above the door signaled, unfortunately, how correct he was. Arin froze, hands tightening around his elbows. He glanced at the door out of the corner of his eye. A figure had a bundle curled in their arms, marching towards one of the empty washers. Arin let himself turn his eye, getting a better image of the person. The guy was tall, gangly, and his hair puffed up ridiculously around his face. He had on an undershirt and black pants, walking with a weird sort of waddle as he clutched some clothes near his stomach. He was coming close to Arin, although he hadn't seemed to notice him yet. 

As he came closer, Arin realized the bundle of clothes was bright red, the smell of blood invading his senses quite quickly. His eyes widened, mouth dropping open. The man stopped in front of a washer several feet away, switching the bundle to his left arm as he dug in his pockets for change. Arin could now see the bottom of his undershirt was stained a light pink, his pants with bits and pieces of something or other stuck to them. He swallowed hard, itching to just run out of there, clothes be damned. He was very keen to keep himself alive, thank you very much.

Just as Arin was turning to do so, the man seemed to notice he wasn't alone. He froze, eyes locking onto Arin's. He glanced down at the bundle of bloody clothes then back to Arin, face suddenly splotched with colour.

"I- Fuck, this isn’t what it looks like, I swear." The man said, his voice rough as if he'd just woken up. Considering his appearance, it wouldn't be very surprising if he had. Well, except for the fact he apparently got up and decided to murder someone. That took hating waking up to a _whole_ new level.

When Arin only tensed up more, the guy scrambled to explain. "I didn't- I'm not some psycho or something. I just- I work at a hospital. ER. Some guy practically died on me. This is- well, that's still weird, but I mean-" He paused, finally digging some quarters out of his pocket and holding them up for Arin to see. "I just didn't want them to stain, you know?"

Arin swallowed, glancing back at the clothes. He should just leave. Come back for his clothes later and call the police. But he found himself speaking before he knew what he was doing. "Why weren't you wearing scrubs then?"

The man blinked, staring at Arin a moment. "I wasn't on shift."

"Then why were you even there?" Arin should really shut up. He really, really should. But apparently, he was a fucking idiot.

"Honestly? I'd just gotten off a shift and was dead tired." He shrugged, looking a bit sheepish as he inserted the quarters into the machine. "I didn't mean to fall asleep in my casuals, but at least I got a few hours of shut-eye before my coworkers got me up. Probably would've been better if I hadn't fallen asleep, though. I might still have clean clothes." He tossed the mess into the washer and glanced around. "You, uh, got any bleach, man?"

"Uh," Arin said, stalling. He had two choices here. One, his original plan to high tail it home and call the cops. Or two, believe the guy and help him out. Now, Arin knew which choice he _should_ go with. But he was apparently a bigger idiot than he expected.

"Sure," He said, grabbing the small bottle from his feet and holding it out for the man. Arin really isn't sure why he did it, especially as his mind screamed at him to just put the damn bottle down, but he didn't waver as the man strode closer. He could now see the red in his cheeks and the shame in his eyes. He found himself feeling sorry for the poor guy, horrible murderer or med student.

"Thanks. Really," The man said, taking the bottle from Arin with a soft smile. He rubbed the back of his neck, glancing down at the bottle. "Sorry if I scared you. I would've just used my own washer at home if it wasn't busted."

"No problem, man," Arin reassured, trying to push away his lingering doubts. "Can't say I didn't think the worst, though."

"I don't blame you," He looked down at himself, grimacing. "I look like I just finished gutting someone." He paused. "Or giving them a really vicious blowjob."

Despite himself, Arin started laughing. "Dude, you'd have to actually tear their dick off to get that much blood on you. You must have wicked jaw strength."

The guy giggled, tugging lightly on one of his curls. "Fuckin, you know it." They stared at each other a moment, Arin taking in the suddenly much less threatening dork before him. 

"So, do you go by the blowjob murderer?" Arin asked, and the guy giggled again. Damn, that was cute.

He shook his head. "Nah. Can't live up to the reputation. I tend to go by Dan instead."

"Mmm, pity." Arin smiled. "I go by the dick strangler, myself."

Dan raised an eyebrow. "Do you strangle dicks, or strangle people with your dick?"

"Both, actually," Arin snorted. "Much more efficient." Dan shook his head, pouring a bit of bleach in the washer's dispenser. Arin watched him carefully, right hand smoothing the nightgown down. "I like Arin, too." He blurted, looking back at his clothes quickly. "That's my name, I mean."

He heard Dan laugh. "Yeah, I figured. Nice to meet you, Arin." He heard the washer startup and footsteps approach him. Arin tugged his nightgown down again, letting out a breath. "So, why the uh, black dress?"

Arin glanced back at him. "It's a nightgown."

Dan blinked. "Oh, okay. Why the nightgown, then?"

"Cause it's 2 am, I'm tired, and I'm comfy." Arin raised an eyebrow, itching to cross his arms back over his chest. Fuck, why hadn't he just gone in a robe or something?

Dan shrugged. "Sorry, just, I don't see too many guys in nightgowns. I mean, I don't know why. They're pretty nice, from what I've heard."

"If you're into airing out your junk 24/7, then yes, they are," Arin said, glancing back at the dryer. "But a lot of people got a stigma against it. Such is the douchebags of this world."

"I hear you, man." He could see Dan's curls shake from the corner of his eye. "People get ridiculous about the stupidest things. Hell, I flirt with one guy at work, I'm getting 'fag' sharpied on my scrubs. People suck."

Arin snorted. "Which is why you blow them to death, of course."

"Oh, of course," Dan laughed. "I'll show you who the fag is when you're getting your dick ripped off, mate."

"Is that an offer?" Arin asked, and immediately he wanted to cover his face. Wow, smooth Hanson. Flirt with the cutie maybe-murderer in the weirdest way possible. Good job. Honestly, if Suzy was here, she'd probably be laughing her ass off right now, and he wouldn't blame her.

After a few seconds, Dan finally spoke. "If you're that into mutilation, I'm gonna go for a hard no." Arin felt his stomach drop, but when he actually looked over at him, he saw he was holding back laughter. Arin just stared at him a moment, before actually putting his head in his hands and groaning.

He felt a hand on his shoulder. "Hey man, don't worry," Dan said, unable to hold back his giggling any longer. "I've heard worse lines, believe me."

He snorted. "Worse than, 'bite my dick off?' Really?" He lifted his head up so just his eyes showed, giving Dan a pointed look. Dan shrugged again, grin still on his face.

"I mean, there was the 70-year-old creep who told me I looked really 'sexy' pulling out his catheter." Arin grimaced and Dan nodded, giggling again. "Yup, true story."

Arin finally let his hands drop, albeit reluctantly. "That makes me feel slightly better, but not by much."

"Hmm," Dan tapped his bottom lip and Arin found himself staring a bit too long at the movement. "Would it make you feel better if I asked you to take me out for coffee to make it up to me?" Arin opened his mouth, closed it, opened it again, and let out a small croaking sound. Dan raised his eyebrows, patting his shoulder again. "You alright there, bud?"

Arin cleared his throat. "Uh, yeah. Sorry, um, yes, okay. I can- that sounds good."

Dan grinned. "And then if I do murder you, it'll be worth it."

Arin chuckled, eyes flickering back to Dan's lips. "Yeah. It might just be."

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know what you thought!
> 
> Wanna talk to me? See my works not posted here? Come join me over on [tumblr!](https://musicalravencreates.tumblr.com/)


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